You are busy, tired and burned-out by the end of the day. I get it. I really do.

But, family meals are too important to skip. Eating together has always played a key role in training kids and keeping families healthy.

If you don’t know, we spend a lot of time together as a family. Even when Knick is busy with coaching and I’m stretched thin, we still eat 99% of our dinners together. It is easier to do this with little kids, since they will be busy themselves as they get older. But, eating together requires prioritizing family meals at all times. Understanding the importance of eating together as a family and how you can make that easier is the first step to establishing that priority.

September is National Family Meals Month and I am so excited to partner with the FMI Foundation to bring you this post on family meals.

Keep reading for some helpful tips and inspiration to get you started on making those family memories across the table.

Are Family Meals Really that Important?

“Home Cooking in America 2020,” by the FMI Foundation[1] notes the biggest reasons families don’t cook meals and eat together at home include lacking time, energy and inspiration. But, homemade family meals create a deep connection, can cost less and can be healthier.

It showed that during the COVID-19 pandemic:

• 40% of American adults say they are cooking more
• 23% are planning more meals in advance
• 18% are trying new dishes more often

Studies show that family meals improve fruit and vegetable consumption. My kids are always more willing to try vegetables if they see us (especially dad) eating them first. Family meals improve communication, teach table behavior and give us a set time to spend time together each day.

Whatever our new normal will be, we need to stay physically and emotionally fit. Family meals help with both. But, so many meals at home means we need to get creative with options for healthy, cheap and easy meals.

Cheap, Healthy and Filling Family Meals

I know all too well what it’s like to feel broke and in need of a cheap meal. Sometimes money gets tight and that’s when you need meal ideas that will stretch out those pay periods without sacrificing your family’s health. Rather than spend money on fast food, you can make cheaper dinners at home. My go-to cost-conscious meal typically involves:

Chicken: usually the cheapest by the pound of the meats, chicken is also one of the more nutritious—high in protein and low in fat. I try to find on-the-bone meat for around $.99/lb and boneless for under $2/lb. It can be added to pasta, grilled, baked or fried.

Green vegetable: Adding a green food to the plate adds nutrients and vitamins without starches or carbs. In-season vegetables are the cheapest and can be as low as $.99/lb. Asparagus, green beans, bell peppers (we eat these raw) and broccoli are all great vegetables to snag when they are on sale. You can also opt for a bag of frozen peas for $1. Kids are probably going to push back a bit on this, but it’s really important to keep putting green foods in front of your kids, despite their protest. I personally make my kids (over 2) eat at least one bite.

Potatoes: Not necessarily the healthiest vegetable, but kids do need carbs to fuel their incredible energy. Unprocessed potatoes are natural and filling. Sweet potatoes are the most nutrient-dense and are a complex carb. Potatoes are very cheap per pound (less than $1) and easy to roast with a little butter or oil, salt, pepper and seasoning salt. They should be started early, since they will usually take longer than the rest of your meal. If you are in a hurry, try microwaving for 3-4 minutes before putting them in the oven to speed up their cooking process.

For our family, a home-cooked meal of chicken, vegetables and potatoes will cost around $10. Add in something fun, like watermelon, and you can still stay under $15.

Not bad for a family meal, right?

You can switch it up with these cheap ingredients instead of the potatoes:

• Pasta noodles (Hearty Chicken and Noodles Soup or chicken parmesan)
• Rice (chicken stir fry or just as a side)
• Homemade bread (it’s cheap and delicious! Try my Perfectly Homemade Dinner Rolls)
• Tortillas (chicken tacos)
• Tortilla chips (chicken nachos)
• Beans (buy them dried in the bag for a healthier, cheaper option)

Fast and Easy Family Meals

I like to make complicated meals because cooking is an art form. But, sometimes you are short on time. Making pretty or complicated food isn’t the point. Sometimes we hold ourselves back because we put too much pressure on the process.

I reached out to Krista Marshall, creator of Everyday Moms Meals, and she stated it perfectly: “Putting a delicious meal on the table to bring your family together can be the best part of a busy day. No matter how simple the meal might be, the most important thing is everyone sharing time with one another, creating memories.”

My personal go-to meals when I’m in a rush are spaghetti and tacos.

It’s also a huge time-saver if I have the chance to make meals ahead of time for the freezer to heat up on another day for dinner. Meatloaf, quiche and chili are a few of my top homemade freezer meals. Even just freezing the cooked meat can be a huge time-saver (like cooked ground beef for spaghetti or tacos). I also tend to put big batches of chicken or burgers on the grill if I can, saving part of the batch in the freezer for a future meal.

Special Family Meals

Sometimes you can splurge—in time or cost—and those are special family meals! While all family meals are important, the special ones can be the most memorable. Some of our favorite ideas for changing up the scene include:

• Outdoor (picnic blanket in the backyard before we had a patio set)
• Our local cinema bar and grille or drive-in movie theater
• Party platters (they love crackers, cheese, sliced meats and wings they can self-serve)

Get creative with your family meals!

When I was a kid, my family ate a lot of meals together. However, some of the most memorable family meals I participated in were at my friend’s house—her parents would let the teens plan a themed family dinner we prepared mostly unaided and presented to the rest of the group. We did a drive-in Dog ‘n Suds while on rollerblades, a very wild Alice in Wonderland Mad Hatter Tea Party and other creative themes.

Eat More Meals as a Family

So, how many meals should you eat as a family?

According to the FMI: As many as you can.

The Journal of Nutrition Education and Behavior (JNEB) recently published a review[2] that sorted through over 1200 studies to look for dietary outcomes linked to family meals. The review found studies agreed on a noticeably higher level of fruit and vegetables during family meals and a lower number of sugar-sweetened beverages.

Did you know September is National Fruit and Veggies Month too? So, take this as your reminder that the goal is  1-2 cups of both fruits and vegetables for kids aged 2-13. Planting a garden has gone far in getting my kids excited about trying vegetables. Having them help make the meal really helps them want to eat it–but that’s a whole other can of worms for another post.

Keep bringing your family together for meals and check out the Family Meals Movement for more ideas and information!

Additional Sources:
<sub>1. FMI Foundation. (2020). Home Cooking in America 2020, a Special Report based on U.S. Grocery Shopper Trends.
2. Robson SM, McCullough MB, Rex S, Munafò MR, Taylor G. Family Meal Frequency, Diet, and Family Functioning: A Systematic Review with Meta-analyses. J Nutr Educ Behav. 2020;52(5):553-564. doi:10.1016/j.jneb.2019.12.012</sub> 

The post Get Your Crew Together: Science Says Family Meals are Important appeared first on MidKid Mama.

But, what if something happened and you couldn’t leave your house for a few days—would you be able to comfortably survive? Do you have the food, water and basic necessities on hand to make things work for even a week or two? There is a reality of natural disasters, diseases, storms and other things occurring at any time and with little-to-no warning.

The current virus threat has schools, workplaces and even whole countries closing down to anything but necessary travel. But I also remember ice storms taking out our power and making it very difficult to travel for over a week when I was a teenager. It happened again when I was in my twenties and living in my own house. There was also the blizzard of ’68 that my parents’ generation will never forget—where the snow was up to the rooftops across our state.

So, are you prepared for the realities of disaster situations?

US Disaster Preparedness Stats

Many people aren’t prepping enough. If something did go wrong, the more people who are prepared to manage their own care for a time, the less emergency services have to rush in with supplies and solutions. If we all had a week or two’s worth of supplies on hand, we could care for ourselves and neighbors that need help.

The last US census reported only about half of American households are storing water. Around 80% of families did report having enough nonperishable foods to last the family for three days. FEMA has stated:

If an earthquake, hurricane, winter storm, or other disaster strikes your community, you might not have access to food, water, and electricity for days or even weeks. By taking some time now to store emergency food and water supplies, you can provide for your entire family.

Back when the ice storms knocked out the power and made it impossible to drive, stores were closed and things were tricky. I remember we had plenty of food, but we shared a friend’s generator so we didn’t lose the food in our refrigerator or have our phone batteries die. We had to have sources of heat, water and cooking, since the power was gone and a boil advisory was in effect for our area. If we would have been down to the last bits of food and supplies before the storm hit unexpectedly, we would have been in a little trouble and had to depend on neighbors and friends for help.

Basic Prepping for Beginners

Prepping and disaster readiness might seem a little out there for many. Perhaps you picture people in off-the-grid underground bunkers with freeze-dried soups and metallic heat-reflecting blankets. But what I’m talking about is scaled back, simple and manageable.

Basic prepping should include necessities you that you are already using in your daily lives for the most part. With basic prepper storage, you want to focus on items that are easy to store, easy to use and have a longer shelf life.

The goal will be to choose items you already use on a weekly, monthly or occasional basis so you can swap them out regularly. You don’t want to buy a special dried soup that you never actually use and it eventually goes bad. You don’t need to waste money on strange foods just because they will last a long time. You can choose items that will be swapped out over time and used naturally in the course of your family’s meal planning.

Easy Snacks

It is a good idea to have foods that can make easy snacks that are fun and filling. Items like Pop Tarts have a very long shelf life, are packaged individually and take no work to prepare (in case of a power outage). Something like pop corn is also fun and filling, but would take power to make, so it works if you just can’t travel. Snacking items can contain veggies, like the fruit and applesauce pouches they have for kids. Try to include as many nutritional snacks as you can in your storage. You want things that last for a while and are easy to store, but many of those items are not going to have a lot of green things in them.

Meal Basics

When you are planning your storage, think about what you need to make a good meal. Most of our meals include vegetables, a starch or carb and then meat. When you are storing food, you want a mixture of these items. It is easy to store a lot of frozen meat, dried noodles and very few vegetables if you aren’t thinking about it much. You don’t want to get overly heavy on the frozen or canned storage because canned items contain more sodium and frozen foods won’t last as long if the power goes out.

Some items, like rice, will require water and a heat source to prepare. While you will have power in many scenarios, you can’t always count on it. A mix of raw and cooked foods is helpful so you are prepared with or without power.

Some items, like noodles, are easy to store, but fairly pointless if you don’t have other things (like sauce or meat) to go well with them. So, when prepping, try to think about whole meals. Try to choose items that can be used in more than one way. Oatmeal, rice and peanut butter are foods dogs can eat too, for example. Canned chicken can be used for sandwiches, soups or on any kind of noodles without any work to thaw or cook it.

Pantry Food Storage

Pantry foods are dried, canned or packaged foods that don’t need to be kept in a specific climate. Preferably your pantry food storage will be a place other than your normal kitchen pantry and will be on the cool/dark side. You can use a basement closet, linen closet or even a big tote under a bed for this. The goal with the pantry storage is to have a few items on hand that you will use over time and replace with new storage items. How many pantry items you keep on hand will vary based on how much space you want to allot to your storage and how much extra food you want to keep on hand.

Get a locking plastic storage tote for items that could easily attract pests. You don’t want to have mice or bugs getting into your storage and invading your home because food is too accessible. A large locking storage tote will keep your items dry, collected into a neat space and safe from pests. Items that are well package in jars or cans will not need to be included in the tote for storage.

Check dates of everything you are planning to store. Ideally, your items will be good for a year or more. Some items, like crackers, don’t have long dates before they start to go stale. You want to give yourself room in case you forget to swap something out, so you want to avoid keeping any short dates in your pantry food storage. Checking the dates will give you an idea of roughly how long you have until you need to use it. If Pop Tarts aren’t really part of your regular family diet, then you know you have a whole year or so before you need to buy another box and use the current storage ones for a fun snack.

Examples of Pantry Food Storage:

• Popcorn
• Pop Tarts
• Snack pouches and/or baby food
• Rice
• Oatmeal
• Couscous
• Quinoa
• Nuts and seeds
• Dried fruit
• Ramen noodles
• Spaghetti/rotini/macaroni noodles
• Egg noodles
• Canned meat, veggies and fruit
• Spaghetti sauce
• Peanut butter
• Honey
• Pancake mix
• Syrup
• Salt/pepper/spices (like 1 or 2)
• Oil
• Flour and yeast (if you like to bake)
• Water flavoring (preferably with vitamins or electrolytes)
• Coffee

Frozen Food Storage

How many things you can store in the freezer is going to largely depend on how much freezer space you have. It’s really nice when you have a separate refrigerator/freezer or deep freezer for food storage because it will give you a lot more space. But even if you don’t, just a few choice items can be stored in the back of your regular freezer in case of emergency.

Examples of Frozen Food Storage:

• Raw or cooked meat
• Lunchmeat
• Sausages and Hotdogs
• Peas and other bagged veggies
• Bread (double bag to avoid freezer burn)
• Easy dinners (pot pies, pizza, burgers, chicken nuggets, burritos, full meals)
• Cheese (including string or sliced cheese)
• Broth (I prefer to make my own and freeze it)
• Homemade meals (chili, quiche, meatloaf, soup, stews)
• Sauces
• Fruit (berries, peaches, pineapples and cherries freeze well)

Water Storage

Occasionally a disaster situation could lead to issues with the water filtration system. There have certainly been boil advisories here before. Keeping water on hand is a good way to have a clean source of drinking water in case of emergency. FEMA recommends keeping a two-week supply of drinking water for every person in the home (that is 7-14 gallons per person!).

While the average adult will only require about a half-gallon per day, sick people, children and pregnant women will likely require more, especially in a hot environment.

“Having an ample supply of clean water is a top priority in an emergency.”

-FEMA

While there are ways to store your own water, the process does involve the right amount of chlorinated bleach. Purchasing commercially bottled water (preferably gallon size or larger to reduce packaging and make storage easier) ensures you have a safe supply of clean drinking water that will last indefinitely.

Hygienic Supplies

Different scenarios (natural disasters where you can’t travel, power outages, national pandemic) will lead to additional items you will want to keep on hand. Cleaning supplies, soap and cooking fuel are examples of things you might want to keep on hand that won’t go bad for a very long time. Medications and batteries are items you will want to swap out every time you buy more for regular use.

Here is a list of things you may or may not want to have on hand. Choose things that you would desperately need if you lost power, had to travel, couldn’t travel or another possible emergency scenario arrived.

• Cleaners
• Soap
• Medication
• Hygiene products
• Batteries
• Skillet/firewood/fuel
• Toilet Paper
• Detergent/bleach
• First aid items
• Rubbing alcohol/witch hazel
• Diapers and wipes
• Unscented candles/flashlight
• Emergency documents

Low Budget Prepping

A lot of us don’t have a big weekly budget. There isn’t much room for building up a stockpile of items. When you are trying to buy extras for disaster prep, it can start out cheap and small. You don’t need to overwhelm your budget to create a pantry buffer. Just like a savings account or rainy day fund in the bank, prepping is best when it builds up slow and steady.

Add More Over Time

Don’t rush out and buy a huge stash unless you have extra cash on hand. You can start small and build up slowly. With just five dollars, you can buy a large box of Ramen noodles, a can of chicken and a couple gallons of water. If you keep buying a few additional items each trip, you will have a couple extra weeks of food in no time.

Plan to Swap Out

It is incredibly important when you are on a low budget that you swap your items out. Plan to stock up on items you already use that you will continue to buy. Each item you purchase, you will put it in your storage stockpile and use the stockpile item.

Check Dates

You might really be surprised at how long some things last while others expire quickly. You want to check dates so you know you can use items before they go bad. If PopTarts last a year, you know you can plan to eat them at any point in the year and you don’t need to plan on them being part of the weekly menu. Other items, like some crackers and noodles, might have a much shorter shelf life, so checking the dates will give you an idea of whether or not an item is good to store. If you use those items every week, then you can store them.

Start Small

Don’t get overwhelmed. Start with just a couple of days of extra food and expand over time Think about how you are going to use your items to create meals. This will help you stay organized and not get into a hoarding situation where you have a lot of items that don’t really work together.

Keep Pests in Mind

In order to protect some items, you will want to store them carefully. While jars of peanut butter or cans of tuna are safe from pests, flour, chocolate and oatmeal are examples of items that can attract pests. From mice to weevils, there are all kinds of things that could be attracted to your stockpile. When items are stored away from your normal kitchen stash, they may be more accessible to invaders and you may not notice as quickly. Store items that could be attractive to bugs and rodents (or pets!) somewhere safe, like in a locked plastic bin.

View Storage as Zero

When you get to a place you feel comfortable with your stockpile, you want to count it as your baseline or “zero.” That means, you don’t dip into it unless you are facing an emergency. You definitely want to swap out items as you buy new ones, but you don’t want to use those items before you have the new ones to swap out. Keeping it in a place separate from your normal pantry or freezer storage for every day use will also help with that separation mentality.

Start a Garden

To help out with your storage, grocery bill and skills, start a garden! While many think of gardening as a hobby, growing vegetables can be tricky but leads to a lot of value. A garden doesn’t necessarily seem like part of disaster preparedness, but knowing how to grow your own food is an important skill.

Growing, harvesting, preserving and saving seeds for the next year are all things that many people know little about. Yet, if something went wrong with the food supply chain, it would be a valuable skill. And, on top of that, you save money while controlling the quality of your food (you can avoid pesticides and soil quality, for example).

Overall, it is important to save up items in case of emergency. Don’t wait until things go wrong to start thinking about potential disaster scenarios. If you want to listen to meal prep ideas, you can check out this podcast:

The post Easy Steps to Disaster Preparedness appeared first on MidKid Mama.

Go Places by Yourself

I love my kids and I love being a SAHM, but sometimes taking a break is like getting a breath of fresh air. Being able to just get out of the car without unbuckling car seats, run into the store and right back out (without answering 20 questions), makes me feel young and free. Yeah, it’s a little extreme, but getting a few breaks throughout the month means moments where I can just be me and not mom first.

Sometimes this means getting a relative to watch my kids. Other times I go during nap time on the weekends when my husband is home. And sometimes, my husband just tells me to go by myself to run an errand or two because he knows I need a mental break.

Establish a Daily Bedtime Routine

This is a slightly controversial one, but sleep exhaustion is a real thing. Studies have found that sleeplessness can have the same impact on the brain as intoxication. Not only is a lack of sleep hard on you as an exhausted parent, but it is hard on the mood, health and growth of your child. Not every kid needs the same amount of sleep. Of our four, two need more than an average amount of sleep for their age, one is pretty average and one could use a bit less than average. But every kid needs a solid block of sleep. I believe in sleep training.

While I don’t judge parents on how they handle sleep (you can do whatever works for you), I encourage struggling parents to set up a schedule and train their kids to follow it. Just like training kids to eat vegetables or to hold your hand while in the parking lot, there are a lot of good habits that don’t come naturally to the majority of babies. As parents, we can decide on schedules that make sense and then work to train our kids to stick to those schedules unless something unusual occurs. Our kids typically sleep from 8 or 8:30pm to 8 or 8:30am. That’s 12 hours of sleep for them and a few hours of quiet time for us before we head to bed.

Finding time to just hang out (we literally Netflix and chill most nights) helps us feel more refreshed for the next day. Getting uninterrupted sleep is also key to feeling up to regular activities and having the energy to parent, work and enjoy life in general.

It takes about 3 nights to form a habit—especially for babies. Gently, but firmly stick to bed times and they will catch on. You don’t need to let them cry for hours. Check in on them after 15 minutes (set a timer) and then keep that up until they go to sleep. I verbally remind them: “it’s night night time right now. It’s time to go to sleep. I love you.” After a few days, it will become natural. Pay attention (especially if your kids are older) to when they are drawing things out and just say “No, it’s time for bed right now.”

Find Your Afternoon Quiet Time

I find my sanity during times in the day when my kids aren’t asking me 20 questions. I love my kids more than anything, but I simply cannot get good amounts of work done when they are up and awake. My kids all take a nap and having that scheduled into our day has made it easier to hold on to.

They often hit stages where they don’t want to nap (especially around 3), but still need the sleep. If you hold on to the habit of the nap, then it works. I tell my kids they don’t have to sleep, but they do have to be quiet and stay in bed (spoiler alert, when they are quiet for more than 15 minutes, they sleep). My daughter is in kindergarten, so she only naps on the weekends or over breaks.

As they get older, they can take a 1-2 hour quiet time in their rooms if they are home during the afternoon. At some point, I know they probably won’t be able to nap because of homework or extracurricular activities. But I am taking advantage of the time they have now to let their brains and bodies rest.

Learn to Say No

I love to be busy and do lots of things, but you still have to sort out what is really best for you and your family. It’s important to choose projects and uses of your time that you feel are truly valuable. For example, I find it valuable to work on art projects, but far less valuable to scroll on Facebook. I love teaching at the gym (great for my health too!), but I might need to say no to signing the kid up for a second session of gymnastics.

This is totally subjective to your family and completely different for everyone. But look at your priorities. Don’t say yes because you are guilted into it or because the opportunity is there. Don’t fall for the hype of being overly busy.

Mini Parent Vacations

At least once (and sometimes twice) a year, we give the in-laws their grandkids and stay in a local hotel for a night. Even though we are in the same city, just having a few hours (and a couple meals) to ourselves is extremely refreshing. At least one other time in the year, we stay home for a weekend, while the grandparents take our kids during a few of their vacation days. These vacations aren’t elaborate, but they are exactly what we need to be more connected and more prepared as parents.

You have to set routines and rules that you are prepared to enforce, even when exhausted. But when you find this balance, things get easier because you aren’t drained and your kids know what to expect.

Look for Joy in the Every Day

At the risk of overwhelming you with opposite points; if you have to escape your life to enjoy it, then something is wrong. Not every day is going to be sunshine and roses. But there is the opportunity for joy and beauty in the everyday moments. Anne Frank wrote in her diary, “I don’t think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains.” Even in the hardest circumstances, our perspective is what we make it. Taking on mantras of gratitude and joy can go a long ways towards improving our feelings about it.

And, while sometimes we spoil our kids and do too much, there are other times we get wrapped up in daily tasks and busyness. It’s hard to slow down and see the value and beauty of the mundane. I’ve written about making the effort to let your kids be bored, and I wrote a post about 10 easy (and free) ways to smile with your kids. It doesn’t have to be extravagant, but adding a smile to your day is good for everyone involved.

Take Time to Pray

The quiet time when you meditate on prayer and focus your thoughts is a great time for destressing and collecting yourself. When I take time to still my mind and think about things from that outside perspective, it helps me not get bogged down in the little things. Burning incense when I pray can cause a helpful reminder to stay focused by the scent. I also use the Bible for reflective prayer when I am struggling to focus.

Know You Aren’t Alone

Most of us don’t feel like great mothers. We feel fuzzy, tired, awkward, inadequate. It can be lonely if you think everyone else has it together. Know you aren’t alone. Intimate women’s Bible studies at my church have been one of the most helpful things for realizing so many of us think and feel the same way.

This doesn’t mean depression/anxiety/stress isn’t real. The purpose of this post is to offer ideas for how to reduce mental strain with some of the things you can control. It all adds up, so alleviating even small points of tension might be enough to get your head above water.

I believe in counseling and I know there are truly things that impact us outside of our control. Talking to a professional about mental health is always a good idea, even if you feel healthy. Thinking through our actions and tendencies helps us be even better versions of ourselves.

We are all tired. We all struggle at times. Keep your head up, mama. Find that peace.

The post Finding Your Inner Peace as a Mother appeared first on MidKid Mama.

Sometimes, stay-at-home-parents forget how to adult. But it’s important to take breaks and come back refreshed for your kids.

Finding a Regular Time Away

We kind of accidentally started a tradition of overnight staycations.

Every Thanksgiving, we go to our in-Laws who live just a couple of hours away in Indy. Our first couple of years as a married couple, we got a hotel for fun. We’ve continued doing this every year, leaving the kids with their grandparents for the night.

Our tradition has become booking a hotel the night before Thanksgiving in the downtown Indy area, just minutes away from the in-laws. We hang out with them and help prep the house for Thanksgiving, then we head to the hotel and get a quiet night sans kids. The next day, we checkout at noon and head over to help with the holiday prep.

Just a Short Time Can be So Refreshing

Sleeping in a few extra minutes without worrying about taking care of the kids, or eating a meal without having to remind kids to eat 87 times, can feel absurdly free. Even driving somewhere and not toting kids and extra bags can make you feel like a singular person again. I absolutely love being a mother, but having a few moments every year to ourselves is encouraging.

Breakfast of Champions

One thing we are sure to do each year is eat breakfast! While I’m not normally a breakfast person (I often don’t eat until noon), on Thanksgiving things are different. We typically don’t eat until the afternoon, so eating a good breakfast gives us energy to meet the kids and help prep for dinner.

This also gives us a chance to spend a little more focused time before we check out. Normally when we first get up, I work or shower while he works out in the hotel gym. So breakfast is a good cap to the stay. Some of our hotels in the past have provided breakfast (which has been amazing), but we always make sure there is at least a good breakfast option close. Starbucks is one of our favorite options.

Finding Time to Connect as a Couple with Kids

Of course, our situation is probably unique to our family. We don’t have grandparents in town who can take our kids overnight at any time. So, we look for a few times a year when we can make those overnight stays happen. The kids love it, the grandparents love it, and we love it. It’s a win, win, win.

Not everyone has parents they can do this with. You might have to be creative. Perhaps you have another relative or friend that could keep your kids for the night. We do a lot of our times together with our kids too, even though that’s not quite the same.

Conversation Starters for Your Spouse

We get into routines and it’s hard to get out of the rut sometimes. It can be fun to find new ways to connect as a married couple.

36 Questions for Your Spouse

One time we took turns answering “36 questions that will make anyone fall in love” from a study by psychologist Arthur Aron. The 36 questions put forth in the study are broken up into three sets. Each set of questions is supposed to be more probing than the last. They are long. Honestly, I think we only got to question 20ish. They are all very open ended, so that is as far as we got over one meal. To give you a taste, the first three questions are:

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

Love Language Quiz

Another interesting topic to discuss with your spouse, is how you love. There are five ways to show love and receive love, according to Gary Chapman. This isn’t the end-all, be-all of relationships, but it really helps you understand where you might be missing each other.

When you speak two different love languages (like Knick and I do), you can really feel like you are speaking different languages. I might feel very unloved without even the most basic forms of physical touch or verbal affirmation. But Knick doesn’t naturally turn to those things to show love. And if I try to just give him a hug, it doesn’t feel like spontaneous love to him—it feels like I’m poking him or needing something from him. I highly recommend taking the Love Language quiz as a couple to give yourself new insights into how you tend to operate.

Experience Something New

If you aren’t really the talking type (or couple), you can always go for a new experience. We’ve ridden horses on the beach and watched new movies together. You could go rock climbing, do an escape room, take a walk on a new path (we play Pokemon Go together) or try a new local restaurant together. New things will get the conversation going in a new direction. The goal is to get out of the daily routine enough that you can feel refreshed in your time together and not the same.

When we stayed in Indy this time, we walked a few blocks to try out a local Pizzeria that had the game playing, rather than watch it in the hotel. It was a really fun time and the food was amazing.

Remember the 80/20 Rule

I don’t know where, but somewhere I heard about the 80/20 rule with marriage and it really resonated with me. It mentioned the majority of people cheat because their spouse is missing 20% of what they want, but they fail to realize they are giving up 80% to chase the 20%.

“The 80/20 Rule is simple. In a healthy relationship, you get about 80 per cent of what you need/want from your partner. They are caring, respectful and share a lot of the same interests as you, but then you meet someone who catches your attention for an unknown reason. It may well be because they fulfill the missing 20 per cent in your relationship…”

Basically, no one is perfect and we really need to be careful how we are judging our significant other. If the other person has 80% of what we want in a mate, then we need to be really careful how we crave the other 20%, because no one is perfect.

If you start looking around to see who has the missing 20%, you might end up leaving for 20% or even 40%, when you already had 80%. Maybe this doesn’t hit you as hard as it did me. I certainly wasn’t looking at cheating or considering a divorce, but it really made me consider my perspective on our relationship. It also made me think about the 20% I was lacking for him—and how subjective it all was! Always challenge your natural instincts because they are often biased, selfish and unfair.

Hopefully, a good date, conversation or night away will have you ready to take on the world together once more.

The post Finding Time to Connect as a Couple with Kids appeared first on MidKid Mama.

“This post on getting green foods into your baby’s diet has been sponsored by Gerber. All thoughts and opinions are my own.”

As a parent, you want your kid to eat plenty of green things and have a balanced diet. But babies often have an opinion about food as well. Out of our four kids, two did not like anything green when they first started trying out foods. Sometimes as a parent, you have to be strategic in order to get green foods into a baby’s diet. The NEW Gerber^® Lil’ Mixers are one way I can help my son expand his taste pallet.

Getting in the Green Foods

The first food I usually tried introducing to my babies after rice cereal was peas. Sweet potatoes and fruits are usually easier for babies to like, so the doctor recommended waiting to introduce those sweeter tastes until the baby ate veggies. Both Klay and Kaleb absolutely hated peas, green beans, spinach, or anything that even looked a tad bit brown (the color of orange baby food when it is mixed with anything green). So, I started mixing together just a couple of the 1^st Foods^® together. I might take peas and add just a spoonful to a container of sweet potatoes.

I’ve also made my own green veggie powder to mix into sweet potatoes but with Gerber, I can get this done quickly. Gerber 2^nd Foods^® made this mix and transition really easy because they often mix those flavors themselves. When they add in the green foods, the baby still tastes the sweeter veggie or fruit paired with it. Klay’s favorites were:

• Sweet Potato, Mango, Kale
• Apple, Avocado
• Carrot, Sweet Potato, Pea

Eventually, we even worked our way up to peas, carrots, and spinach (which were more green than he could handle at first).

Working Up to Food Texture (While Still Getting in Green Foods!)

Many kids struggle with texture, too. According to one study published in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association and looking at the eating habits of infants, 19% of 4- to 6-month-olds are picky eaters. That number jumps to 50% for 19- to 24-month-olds and only gets worse through toddlerhood. The dislike of vegetables starts early and often persists through childhood.

To combat this, many professionals encourage parents to avoid the “easy” solutions of the common children’s food menu (chicken nuggets, peanut butter and jelly, macaroni and cheese, etc.) and opt for as many nutrition-focused meals as possible. While the occasional “children’s meal” is okay, it is the consistent exposure to new tastes and textures that helps them develop a diverse palette. But, it can be really hard not to turn to the quick foods you know your baby likes.

Gerber does a really good job of helping babies move from the blended tastes to experiencing new textures by remixing mealtime with the Lil’ Mixers. There are 8 combinations inspired by homemade tastes with no artificial colors or ingredients.

They are so easy, and I know he will get nutrition in every bite! Lil’ crisp? Lotta crisp! Add texture your way. The texture is in a separate container, so you can custom mix the amount you want in the food (the food isn’t wasted if your baby isn’t feeling the extra texture!). Plus, some textures are best kept dry to keep them from getting mushy from being premixed in the food.

Klay is a huge fan. They offer the flavor of other Stage 2 foods, but with an additional texture for toddlers like him that are starting to outgrow purees.

You can explore the whole range of Lil’ Mixers by heading to Walmart and using this Ibotta offer! I go to Walmart for a convenient one-stop shop. We grabbed some of these while the auto center replaced the battery on our van. They are located in the baby food aisle, on the end of the Gerber food section.

Offering Green Foods as Snacks

Another tip is to make healthy foods (especially vegetables) the only option for snack time. Just offer whatever vegetable you are cutting up for dinner. If your kids are at all like mine, they will actually start to enjoy raw green beans, sweet peppers, celery, and carrots.

For babies, this can be difficult because they are hungry and don’t fully understand dinner is right around the corner. Gerber also has all kinds of snacks, like Veggie Melts^® snacks or veggie-filled granola bars, that even make snack time nutritious.

Once they are old enough to understand they can either eat the fresh vegetable snack offered or wait for dinner (around 2.5 or 3), it gets easier to make the vegetables an exciting treat. And they learn from each other. Klay has been more willing to gnaw on a green bean when he sees the older kids think it’s cool.

Keep offering the green foods and textures. Use Gerber to help with the transition. Over time, they will become familiar and your child won’t be as limited with taste. Use Gerber to help with the transition. Over time, they will become familiar and your child won’t be as limited with taste.

The post Getting Green Foods into Your Baby’s Diet appeared first on MidKid Mama.

I was recently included in an article on Thrive Global with several other bloggers collaborating to come up with 100 Ways to Make Someone Smile from Mom Bloggers. I thought this would be the perfect time to talk about 10 easy and inexpensive ways you can smile with your kids.

1. Record Everyday Moments and Activities

Set up a tripod and read your kids their favorite book or sing a song with them on a selfie video with a timer. Right now it might feel silly, but you will cherish those memories of everyday moments. If you are the mom behind the camera, you probably aren’t in enough of the family memories.

And, please, don’t let your weight or self-esteem stop you. Even if you feel a little uncomfortable, you will one day look back and be glad you are at least pictured as part of the activities. Your kids love you the way you are, so don’t deprive them of having photo and video memories to cherish. More than likely, you will cherish the “dull” everyday moments being captured more than the occasional birthday or sporting event video.

2. Add Their Names to a Familiar Story

Do you have a favorite book? Read it, changing one of the character’s names to their own without any warning. They will likely find this hilarious. You might even change a few parts to better fit their own personality, habits or possessions. Or you can also change up familiar songs if you are quick on your feet like that.

3. Celebrate the National Day

Did you know October 24^th is National Bologna Day and October 25^th is National Breadstick Day and National Frankenstein Day, among other things? Each day has a handful of somewhat unknown holidays that you can find fun ways to bring to light. Check out what today’s National Day is by looking at the National Day Calendar. Then have a blast finding the most ridiculous one and celebrating it!

4. Try a Balancing Contest

One foot? No problem! Try tossing a small ball up at the same time, or reaching your foot back to hip height with a straight leg. Improving your balance can help with core stability and the small exercise will even help boost your mood by getting the blood flowing. More than likely, you will find it easy to crack a smile as your watch your little try to balance on wiggly legs.

5. Make a Fun Plate

Mix up lunch or dinner a bit by making a face with the food! From bananas to sandwich triangles, you can start with the mouth. Then add fruits or veggies to make eyes. Or go the IHOP route and use whip cream and a few chocolate chips on a pancake for a fun and easy pancake. This can be as much fun to make as it is to eat.

Or, a simpler spin on this could be to just make a whip cream “worm” on their finger as a really fun and silly snack! A restaurant did this once while we were on a vacation and it was a hit for everyone from the small kids up to the teens.

6. Make Snacks or Treats to Share

Have your kids help you make cookies, soap, bath salts, bread or really anything they can take to share with their teacher, neighbors, coach, etc. Put it in a cute bag (there are usually several options in the baking isle) and help them deliver it with a small note. This one may be a bit more in-depth, but my kids love doing things like this for other people.

7. Take a Toddler Survey

Got small kids? For children ages 2-6 (maybe even older!), a survey can result in some really funny answers worth recording. Share them to Facebook or write them down in a journal to laugh over later too. Here is one I did with my 3-year-old and the outcome was pretty funny:

**TODDLER INTERVIEW – No coaching..**

• What’s your name?
• How old are you?
• How old is your mommy?
• What’s your favorite color?
• What’s your favorite food?
• Who’s your best friend?
• What’s your favorite song?  
• What do you like to watch on tv?
• What’s your favorite animal?
• What are you scared of?
• What makes you happy?
• Where’s your favorite place to go
• What do want to be when you grow up?
• What is love?
• Who loves you the most?

8. Recreate Old Memories

Have slightly older kids (3+)? Try remaking an older picture with a fun memory. Whether your picture is from one year ago or 10, try to get in the same position and make the same faces as the original picture. Hopefully you will smile with your kids and get some fun comparison memories as well out of this silly shoot. The more absurd the original picture, the better!

9. Go Outside and Collect Something

Leaves? Flowers? Bugs? Sticks? Rocks? Whatever is outside and in-season, go collect it. Explore your surroundings and then compare what you’ve found. You can use crayons to stencil leaves onto paper, trace rocks and turn them into faces, paint on rocks, use a magnifying glass to examine bugs/leaves/flowers and so much more.

10. Give a Ridiculous Answer

If you are a slightly frazzled mother like me, then it might also be due to kids asking silly things 24-7 and frying all of your brain cells. I have a rule that a ridiculous question gets a ridiculous answer. Most of the time, this leads to smiles instead of irritation or exasperation. It not only helps them to develop a sense of humor, but it also helps them to think about what they are asking and if the answer is something they already know.

“Are you going to make us lunch?” My three-year-old asks. “Nope,” I reply. “Never again. I decided we don’t need ANY more food. Ever.”

If they look concerned I giggle and tell them that was a silly question. They catch on quick. If it isn’t done in a mean-spirited way (really trying to trick them and get a rise out of them), it can be a lot of fun. Smile with your kids and teach them at the same time!

Kid watches me drop my phone and asks immediately, “Did you DROP your PHONE??” Me: “Nope, it flew out of my hands because it yearns for freedom.”

The more ridiculous the answer, the more funny I find it deep in my soul. An extra five points if you can keep a dead straight face while responding.

Smiling is Free

You might not always feel like smiling, and that’s okay. But look for reasons to create joy and smile with your kids on a daily basis. Happiness is good for you on a mental and physical level. The more we can find reasons to smile, the better we are going to feel. You don’t need to go spend money or do something elaborate to build good memories with your family.

The post 10 Easy Ways to Smile with Your Kids appeared first on MidKid Mama.

Responsive prayer can occur with any verse in the Bible as you allow the words to move you. React to the truths, and let the words apply to your life as they do. Not only can the verses help keep you focused, they can also help you deepen your prayers and move past ruts of repetition.

You can really use any verse, but here are some beautiful, uplifting Bible verses for responsive prayer.

His Righteousness Endures Forever

Praise the Lord!

I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,

    in the company of the upright, in the congregation.

Great are the works of the Lord,

    studied by all who delight in them.

Full of splendor and majesty is his work,

    and his righteousness endures forever.

Psalm 111

Before All Time and Now and Forever

Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen.

Jude 1:24-25

Bless the Lord O My Soul

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

    and all that is within me,

    bless his holy name!

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

    and forget not all his benefits,

who forgives all your iniquity,

    who heals all your diseases,

who redeems your life from the pit,

    who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,

who satisfies you with good

    so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

He Gives Power to the Faint

Isaiah 40:28-31

Have you not known? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

    the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He does not faint or grow weary;

    his understanding is unsearchable.

He gives power to the faint,

    and to him who has no might he increases strength.

Even youths shall faint and be weary,

    and young men shall fall exhausted;

 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;

    they shall mount up with wings like eagles;

they shall run and not be weary;

    they shall walk and not faint.

Psalm 103:1-5

Every Tongue Confess that Jesus Christ is Lord

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Phillipians 2:3-11

Wisdom from Above

But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

James 3:17-18

The post 5 Uplifting Bible Verses for Responsive Prayer appeared first on MidKid Mama.

What I Love About Home Schooling

I love teaching small children. The curriculum isn’t difficult and you can focus more on skill building and learning by doing. When they are learning at home, they are here with me all of the time. I know these years are flying by. I am one of those weird moms that wants to hold onto them. Not everyone is thrilled with staying home with their kids all day, and not everyone even has that choice. But I do. And The last two years of teaching them here has been great.

Home schooling has allowed me to decide where they need to work more and watch them grow as little individuals. More than that, I have control over how fast she goes and what we spend our time learning.

Every Student is Different–Stay Flexible

All of last year I watched a kid who wanted to go to school so badly. She constantly talked about what it would be like. She was embarrassed to tell people she did school at home. When people would ask her what grade she was in, she would say she didn’t go to school (we worked on that). Even though she was learning reading, math, art and more, she wanted to go to “real school” (I have all but banned that term in my house now).

She did great at home, but she absolutely loves being around kids all of the time. Even though she had a lot of friends we saw several times a week (at the Y or at sports), most of the kids her age were heading off to school. We would have needed to join some kind of co-op or homeschooling group this year to make sure she still got the regular interaction with friends her age.

Over the summer I started thinking about whether or not I was holding her back. She loves structure and thrives in learning environments. As much as I wanted to keep her home, I also wanted her to spread her wings. I would have needed to be a lot more structured with her school this year, and that would have been hard with the boys–who I still want to do more playing and exploring throughout their day.

I’ve always said schooling shouldn’t necessarily be the same for every student. Home schooling can be the best option, but so can sending a kid to school. I think giving her a chance to try kindergarten will help her experience a part of the world she thought she was missing out on at home. I don’t know what our plans are for next year or any other year.

It was literally a thought overnight that made me reconsider my plans. My husband was more excited about sending her to school than I thought he would be. As a teacher, he gets his pick of elementary schools in his district, so I’m confident in the school she’s at. We did look at private and Christian schools in the area, but they are pretty pricey and not something we wanted to swing right now.

Early Education at Home

Even though we did kindergarten last year, we put her in again this year to make sure she’s 18 when she graduates. So much of the material is going to be familiar to her, but she is the kind of student that will still learn and grow, not get bored.

I trust her as a kid. She’s really responsible. Early on, I worried about how much she wanted to please other people. But she’s shown she’s strong enough to make good decisions on her own. I don’t know how I’ll feel about the boys when they are that age. I don’t want to send a kid to school when I think they will be pressured to go with the crowd and follow the ideas of other kids. We talk about right and wrong a lot here–making good decisions even if no one else is.

I’m glad I kept her home until now. I feel like full days are a lot for a young kid. She still took a nap every day this summer and plays a lot. I want them to be kids, exploring and learning through play. I want them to stay with me for those early years where they are still developing their understanding of the world.

I’ve posted before that Pre-K and Kindergarten are easy to do at home. I’m still keeping the boys home this year. We will be doing pre-K with the 2-year-old and the first year of kindergarten with the 4-year-old.

The post Sending my Kindergartner to School (Instead of Homeschooling) appeared first on MidKid Mama.

*Amazon affiliate links are included. Book choices are entirely my own, but I can make a small commission on any books you purchase through these links.

I am a picky writer and artist (with a focus in illustration), so I don’t take book selections lightly. My favorite books read easily, keep kids entertained, teach something valuable and have great illustrations. While I have hundreds (maybe thousands) of books, not all are equally good. Here are 10 picture books that meet all the qualifications and are perfect for getting your child started in school. I believe they are a must-have for every home–especially if you are home schooling.

Alphabet Picture Books for Pre-K and Kindergarten

Dr. Seuss’s ABC

This book is one I grew up with. The fun rhyming scheme changes up so it doesn’t get overly repetitive. Dr. Seuss is a master at making learning fun during a time when Dick and Jane books were the most common early readers. This book will help children recognize letters and start catching the way they start the words (even made up words!).

After reading it a few times, I made my kids say every letter when I pointed at it, “Big ____ [point to F and wait for them to say it], little [point to f and wait for them to say it].” Over time, this really helped them recognize the letters and it kept them involved in the book.

Chicka Chicka Boom Boom

Bring the ABC characters to life for your little one with the Chicka Chicka Boom Boom book. The full book is longer than the board book, so it is my preferred choice (though, we have both because my kids aren’t allowed free access to our paper books yet). The letters climb up the tree, only to come crashing back down. Will there be enough room?

This book creatively introduces your littles to to the lower case letters and then brings out the upper case as the mamas, papas, aunts and uncles. Point out each letter as you say it’s name so your choice can get used to the lower case.

Charley Harper’s ABCs

It’s a great idea to also have one or two alphabet books that are a bit more simplified. ABC books are some of the easiest learning books to find, so don’t feel bad if you see one more that you just have to have.

The stunning art of Charley Harper are realistic forms simplified down to their most basic shapes and colors. These beautiful illustrations are paired with the letter and one word to go with it. As simple as this book is, it helps keep your child focused on the alphabet and nature.

As simple as the page illustrations are, the inner cover of the book is filled with Charley Harper illustrations. This provides an additional opportunity to learn about new animals. You can also discuss what letter begins each animal’s name. on this page.

Counting Books for Pre-K and Kindergarten

10 Apples Up On Top!

The fun story of three strangers and their apple skills will keep your preschooler or kindergartner laughing and learning at the same time. Dr. Seuss, writing under his secondary pen name of Theo. LeSieg, provides a ridiculous rhyming story filled with simple math problems and counting.

Counting Crocodiles

The crocodile-filled Sillabobble sea stands between a monkey and a tempting bandanna tree. But that clever monkey knows just what to do–count the crocodiles!

This book rhymes crocs with 10 creative descriptors as the monkey counts his way to the island. The cool crocs are so busy being counted, they don’t even realize the monkey has been successful. I love that this book shows counting 10 groups of crocs and not just adding one on each time. Sometimes kids get confused and think the number is assigned to a specific item. This shows them a visual picture of each number group as a whole band of 55 towards the end.

There are so many fun details in this book. My kids love to see how the fox and snail follow along. But the clever little monkey even thinks ahead enough to bring back a banana tree start if you catch the sneaky illustrations.

One Hundred Hungry Ants

Another great book that breaks up counting and teaches math themes in a fun way. One Hundred Hungry Ants are 100 strong and marching to feed their hungry bellies.

Unfortunately, the littlest ant keeps having great ideas about changing the formation in the hopes that it will speed things up. All those ants scrambling into new groups only slows them down. But, it does provide for great math visualizations (and laughter as the other animals make off with the picnic food).

Other Learning Picture Books for Early Education

Blue Hat, Green Hat

Sandra Boynton books are some of our absolute favorite. Her fun rhyming stories are often easy to read and her silly illustrations keep all of us entertained. This book teaches colors, dressing and “normal” behavior. Silly turkey!

For really young readers, I like to point out why we say oops. So I’ll read it, “Red shirt, blue shirt, yellow shirt, OOPS! Silly Turkey! The shirt doesn’t go on your legs!!!” This always gets giggling out of the one who is on the verge of getting the joke, but might need it taken a step further.

The Shape of Me and Other Stuff

As an art teacher, I absolutely love this book. It teaches shapes (outside of the typical circle, square, triangle) and creative perspective.

It’s fun to talk about what other shapes we might be. Or what our favorite shapes are in the book. I love that there are no details, focusing entirely on shape.

Zoo Zen: A Yoga Story for Kids

I love yoga and have been doing it frequently starting around the time I was pregnant with Kam. Kniya was only two at the time and Kaleb one, but they both joined right in and learned yoga with me. So, this book is such a fun new addition to my early learning picture book collection!

The illustrations are amazing, the girl has brown skin and curly hair (a huge plus for our household), and the creative poses get the kids moving.

Of course, as you read each page, you have to try the pose!

Some Bugs

My kids have some crazy terror of bugs. I highly encourage finding a book about plants or animals that helps your kids discover something unknown to them. This brand new book was just released and I’m loving it. The illustrations are SO fun and the descriptions are creative, though very simple.

After reading through, we talked about what bugs they had seen in our own back yard. I think every page had at least one bug they had seen in real life before.

Nursery Tales

Sorry this one doesn’t have a link, but there isn’t really a right or wrong book for this (or maybe I just haven’t found my absolute favorite yet). Make sure your little preschooler or kindergartner is learning nursery rhymes, fables, classic tales and poems. These nursery stories are one of those things everyone is expected to know later in life. An early exposure will give those memories to your kids that they can share with others. I have several, but this is an old one with pretty vintage illustrations and straightforward stories.

Reading with Your Preschooler and Kindergartner

You can’t really start reading too early. Even reading to your baby in the womb has shown spiked brain activity. Choosing the right books will only help those reading times be even more effective.

I’m always on the hunt for great books. Do you have any favorite picture books for early learners that I’m missing from the list?

I’ve teamed up with other bloggers to write about our favorite picture books! Check out yesterday’s post on Quick and Fun Rhyming Books by Mother in the Mountains.

The post 10 Picture Books You Need for Early Education appeared first on MidKid Mama.

Dieting. Ugh. Growing up this seemed like the worst thing in the world that adult women had to do. My mom despised it and went off and on diets all the time. And why is it so often women that struggle more with their metabolisms? My dad would eat ice cream, Smarties and drink Pepsi every day, while my mom would go on binges of strictly nuts and fruit.

As a kid, I hated working out (but played sports, so I was very in shape). Competitive activities take my mind off the mundane factor of exercise. Through college I didn’t have to think about what I ate or drank at all. My only rule back then was rarely going over one soda a day.

But, Then You Get Older

Obviously with age, things change. With pregnancy, they change even more. I gained weight with each pregnancy, but then had trouble dropping all of it after. My kids are all very close together (18-20 months apart), so I’d be pregnant again before I was completely slimmed down. I still didn’t have many rules, except: eat more vegetables.

And, on top of that, kids wear you out. By the end of the day, your decision making is pretty shot and you feel like you deserve the world. Okay, not the world, but a glass of wine and chocolate or a large pretzel at the very least.

Step 1: Getting into the Gym Habit

Three years ago (while pregnant with Kam), I started doing yoga. It was to help with my joints, but I found it was challenging for my muscles and improved my balance. After he was born, I started working out 6-7 times a week. I did loose weight, but not all of it.

I got my instructor training to teach at the gym in order to make sure I stayed consistently there and active. But then, I got pregnant with Klay (planned, but my weight loss was shot). So, I kept working out all the way up until just days before he was induced. I pushed myself to keep going hard after he was born (and I was healed). As usual, I lost some of the baby weight, but still nowhere near what I wanted to be. I cut soda completely.

Step 2: Cutting the Soda Habit

I knew soda was bad, but it was so delicious to me. I finally decided I could forgo soda for things like wine or even sugar free drinks. It was hard. I didn’t lose a lot of weight. But, overall, I’m really glad it’s no longer a habit.

Step 3: Fixing the Food Habit

So, here we are. It’s been over a year of not being pregnant, not drinking soda and going to the gym at least 3x a week.

I’m in shape, but not the size or weight I want to be. I love vegetables and cooking, but I also love carbs, all forms of sugar and fast food. They say, it’s about an 80/20 ratio between eating and working out in regards to your weight. I finally made the decision I’ve been dreading—I needed to count something (calories?) and get a lot more strict.

I know people who have done the lemon water cleanse, the watermelon diet, Weightwatchers and Atkins. My roommate from college was the first person I knew who successfully did the Keto diet. It seemed impossible to cut starches and carbs, but the more I looked at the food options, the more I realized it wasn’t that far from what I was already doing. Most of all, I wanted something that could be a long term solution. I do not want to lose the weight, just to gain it back in a few years.

What is Keto?

Keto is just focusing on increasing fats and cutting nearly all carbs (less than 50g a day). Based on that 2,000 calorie “average” diet they base the nutritional facts on for product information, this is about 15% of the daily intake expectation. That means a diet would normally consist of around 300g of net carbs a day after the fiber is removed.

Carbs are what the body turns into sugar. When your body is running on sugar, it isn’t burning fat efficiently. Dropping below 50g net carbs each day results in the body burning fat.

Net Carbs vs Total Carbs for the Keto Diet

It isn’t just the total carbs you are counting, by the way. With Keto, you only count NET carbs. So, you take out any grams of fiber or sugar alcohol from the total number to get the net carb number. Chia seeds are 13g of total carbs, but also 10g of fiber in a 3Tbsp serving. That makes the net carbs only 3g per serving, or 1g per Tbsp. This is because of how your body will process and store the carbs you eat.

I wasn’t going to stick strictly to Keto. My original plan was to cut all processed sugars, grains and starches. I thought I’d eat mostly meats and veggies, but that I could eat fruit too. What I found, was that even an apple or large slice of watermelon made up almost all of my carb count for the day. While I’m focused on shedding excess fat, it seems best to count all of those carbs. This means the only fruits I really eat are berries (especially raspberries) and sometimes cherries as a special treat because these are lower in sugar and higher in fiber.

Not all Fats are Equal

Keto can be really unhealthy or very healthy. Remember, there is a big difference between unsaturated fats and saturated fats. Using too much margarine, for example, can lead to higher cholesterol levels. While avocados, fish and eggs are all high in healthy fats that will lower your cholesterol levels. So, while you are working to boost fat, try to find the best sources for the vast majority of it!

The Keto Flu

The first three days were the hardest. I felt tired and sluggish. I wasn’t hungry (because I had plenty to eat), but I burned with a craving for any major carb source. It didn’t help that ALL of my most favorite foods were carbs. They call these first few days the “Keto Flu” for most people. Your body is transitioning from burning sugar to fat.

The Benefits of Keto

Around day 5, I started feeling good. I have more energy. I don’t crave carbs nearly as much. One of the strangest changes has been my already good sense of smell is even more heightened. Grocery shopping, I wasn’t tempted at all by all of the bakery goods, but I suddenly had a desperate craving for Toaster Strudels while in the frozen foods section (I haven’t bought those in years).

My Keto Goals for Weight Loss

I have two goals in my weight loss numbers. I believe the first goal will be relatively easy because the initial weight often comes off the fastest. I want to lose 40lbs as my first goal and as quickly (but healthily) as possible. I want to lose another 20lbs as a secondary goal that I’m willing to take longer to achieve.

I will keep working out, but I’m upping my weightlifting, so some of my weight loss may be slowed by muscle gain, but it won’t change my goals.

I’m going to shoot for drinking a gallon of water a day.

When I reach my goal, I plan to increase my daily net carb limit to 100g and see how that goes. I want to focus on healthy foods, but knowing I can have a homemade roll or piece of chocolate without dramatically cutting into my day would be really nice. We’ll see how it goes.

Week 1: Down 12lbs

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